Even so, it’s unbelieveably aggravating when I am made to work with a client who thinks they know *more* than I do about what I do. I don’t mind collaborative work, and actually appreciate ideas that come from clients. After all, they usually know more about their business, market and industry than I do. But when they begin to make decisions about design based on their own appetitive notions, I can’t help but get frustrated.

What’s more, they don’t seem to want to listen to my reasoning, which is usually backed by some experience or training they never had. There’s no respect for what I do. I’m just a computer monkey to this sort of person, I guess. Why bother hiring me? Just do it yourself, jackass.

/pout

But for all that I’m still better off. I’m consistently busy, and the work that comes at me is much more manageable. I credit this to good client management, good project management, and having the systems in place to handle all the little details that go with each task.

Being back in a team environment is refreshing. Interacting with interesting and enjoyable people while at work makes all the difference. Also, more minds generally equals more ideas, which comes in handy when one person gets stuck.

In general my experience is good, so far. I can still see room for improvement, but I am restraining myself somewhat. It’s probably best to find a good seat in the boat before rocking it too much…

Less dramatic, though, I’ve been offered another position – perhaps not quite ideal, but apparently better than where I am now. I accepted, and put in my notice.

And it feels great. I am unsure of how well the new place will work out. I expect trade-offs; there are good and bad points in any position at any company. And I expect a certain amount of office bullshit. But I am also expecting more organization and structure, better communication and clearer parameters.

I can always dream.

So until things go to shit again, I’m out.

I’ve heard a lot of references to company loyalty in my time with my current employer, and each time my first thought is, “Are you serious? Are you really expecting me to be loyal for ABSOLUTELY NO REASON?” And that’s the crux, really: there has to be a reason for a person to be loyal to anything; a person, organization, or cause, etc. Right now I really have none, except perhaps for my obligation to the clients I do work for.

But what is it about some people that makes them think that loyalty is something given for no reason? Is the fact that I am employed with a certain organization reason enough for me to remain loyal? I don’t think so. It seems to me that loyalty is NOT the default state of things, but it is something that must be earned; not with mere words but with action, and consistent action at that!

Being somewhat naive when I started, I think I did hold some sense of loyalty to my employer. After all, it was they who gave me the opportunity. I needed them more than they needed me, and in the beginning I was excited about the work and the potential for growth and advancement.

It’s all different now, and I don’t think I’m going too far in saying the company was never loyal to me – not in the slightest – and so I don’t see a reason to be loyal to them. In fact I don’t care for them at all. I don’t agree with the way they do business or treat their employees, and I definitely don’t agree with the way they treat clients. I ma underpaid, see no prospects for future growth or advancement, and have pretty much learned all I can learn working here. They possess none of the qualities that might inspire loyalty, and they’ve done nothing to earn it. There’s just no incentive.

Some readers might think I’m being a bit selfish. You’re damn right. Working in a place like this, I have to look out for me and my own, and no one else. Because you can be damn sure that’s what they’re doing.

I have no salespeople. In fact, I have no team at all. I am expected to do all the administrative tasks, all the walk-in sales, all the client management, all the project management, all the art direction, and all the production work. And all the while I am expected to maintain a high level of billable hours.

It’s ridiculous, and it’s not going to change until someone starts selling. But that doesn’t matter to the brass.

It’s bad enough when a client wants to take my design – something I created based on their market, their brand, their target, and their need – and schlock it all up. usually it’s because they have no idea what they are doing. Sometimes it’s because they have a little design background, and think they know what they’re doing. Once in a while they will have a good suggestions.

Even worse is when a co-worker does it; especially someone who is not experienced in design and who has not the technical training. There’s no reason for this at all. but it’s another sympton of the more fundamental problem in a company like this: good design is not valued at all. And not just graphic design, but the way company processes and policies are designed. It’s a hodge-podge of inconsistencies and lack-logic structures.

Why did I bother learning to be a designer? I could have dropped out of college and done the same crap I’m doing now.

The fundamental cause of this entire breakdown was a lack of good and honest communication. I add “honest” in there because even good communication, if insincere or deceptive, is just as detrimental to relationships as plain bad communication. Consistently bad or dishonest communication does not build relationships; it destroys them. In this case the outcome was that no one cared about the company anymore, and people left or got fired.

Consider: if the people who own a company will not, can not, or do not convey their expectations, goals, and plans for the company and its employees, everyone is left in the dark. We flail around blindly, searching for the tools we need to do the job we think we’re here to do without being able to see the outcome when it’s all done, and all the while the top brass has their hand over the light switch. And they wonder why we aren’t efficient.

It wearies me. It’s stagnating; a festering disease. I don’t care anymore.

Since the events took place that caused this blog to be created, I’ve in a sense been “pushed” out of that loop. Some of it is due to my own decision to stop giving a good goddamn, of course, but there is still this sense of being sort of “demoted,” if that makes any sense. Not only do my opinions seem less important, but so does my work.

And yet as I write this I realize this is the way it’s always been. Only now, after this professional mini-apocalypse, do I realize how truly unimportant I am to my employer.

It’s the fundamental lack of respect for other people that makes this a problem, and this feeds all kinds of silly behavior on their part. The bottom line is this: if you don’t treat your employees like people rather than assets, they have no reason to want to work for you; no loyalty or incentive to work any harder than it takes to not get fired (thanks, Office Space).

Sometimes when I’m mashing keys I pretend they are people.

Yet I know many of you are like me: reduced to apathetic zombies, churning out inferior products for people who don’t give a damn. The reason is simple: if your superiors don’t give a damn, neither can you. You can certainly try, and you will succeed – or appear to succeed – for a time, but inevitably your efforts are in vain and your cute little snowman gets knocked over by the big kids.

This brings me to the beginning of my little story, where I started building the coolest snowman on the block.

I was hired to do a job, and do that job I did. I did it well, even. All was right with the universe. But problems began to surface as I worked along, oblivious to the fate that awaited me. These problems were trivial at first; mere hurdles, easily overcome. I began to communicate with my employers about these issues, however, as they grew larger and more complicated, effecting my work directly. The Man was cool; all were agreed that solutions were in order.

Nothing happened. Are you surprised? I was, at least at first. The trend continued: more problems reared their ugly heads, some of them the same as before. I began to understand this mass of difficulty before me was of the hydra variety; cut off one head, the body lives and grows. In my vast ignorance and boundless optimism, I gathered my arsenal and went straight for the body, determined to destroy this fell beast once and for all.

Epic. Fail.

As I fought my little battle, I began to realize the very tools I used to fight it were turning against me; indeed, aiding the enemy!

Communication was the problem. The paradox of the situation is likely all to familiar to anyone reading. How do you fix broken communication when good communication is required to do so? How will honesty fair against dishonesty? How can you effect understanding in those who refuse to understand, or even listen?

You get the idea. There are problems within the organization that directly effect my ability to do quality work, deliver on promises to customers, and otherwise do my job well. Because I cared about my work and the overall success of the organization, I did my very best to fix these problems; analyzing, communicating, asking, listening, offering solutions. I had a team to work with, and we were all in the same boat.

Alas, to no good end. They are gone; only I remain. The Beast is larger and more powerful than ever before, and I am helpless before it. I can only hide in my cave each day, mashing my little peon keys with my little peon fingers, and return home – desolate, weary, and uncaring.